Doubts

In a recent conversation I had the person expressed a reluctance to share their doubts concerning God with me because they didn't think I ever had any doubts. I know that many people think that pastors don't doubt. Well, I don't know about other pastors, but I do.

My doubts fall into one of two kinds. One area of doubt I have is about God's goodness.I doubt some times that He is a good all-loving God. I know that sounds bad. I don't doubt God's existence because there is just to much evidence that God is. I do however at time question God's love for people (usually me or someone I love). I don't always understand why God does something or allows somethings to happen. I some times don't have a clue as to what God is doing.

When I am in one of those doubt periods of my life I have found two things that help me to trust God. One is to believe God is who He says He is in Scripture and second to focus on the cross. I know I will never understand God fully. If I did He would be a pretty wimpy God. I have to believe that God is:
1 John 4:8 & 16 - Love
Psalm 111:4 - Gracious
Daniel 9:9 - Merciful
Exodus 34:6 - Abounding in Love
I have to see the cross as an eternal proof of His love and grace ande mercy. I have to believe along with Paul what he says in Romans 8:32, "He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all - how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" God gave Jesus so that my sin could be paid for and I could know God and be with Him for eternity.

So based on what Scripture says and on the reality of Jesus' death on the cross for me - I Believe He is a Good and Loving God!

The second area I have doubts about God are really doubts that I am not good enough. I believe that God can and is willing to do anything for You not me. I am a nobody and there is no reason why God should love me or do anything important in my life. My doubt is about God working in and through me.

When I have this doubt I simply argee that I am not good enough, I am not worth it, and that I don't deserve anything. I also acknowledge that I never will be good enough or deserve it. The fact that Jesus had to come and die for me says that God knows I Can't Do It! So by recognizing and admitting my totally inability to be good enough I again see the cross as relieving my doubts. I see God as agree that I am not good and that I don't deserve His love, but loving me anyway. When God loving me is based in Him and not me then my doubts can be handle.

I still at times doubt. The latest was let's see, yesterday. I will always go through seasons of doubting. It is not the doubting that is the issue, it is what do I do with my doubt. Peter summs it up well in John 6:68 when he says, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life." I will go to Jesus.

Raising the Roof and Removing the Walls
                               Joe  

Surrender

We think of surrender as defeat. God sees surrender as freedom and victory. We are slaves either to Satan or God. If Satan is our master we have surrendered ourselves to him and we have given him control. We are thus slaves with no freedom or victory. If God is our master we have surrendered ourselves to God and we have given Him control.

Paul writes in Romans 6:13-14, "Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness. For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace." When I have surrendered my life (including my body) to God and He is my master then I can experience life and righteousness and grace.

When God is my master I can also experience true freedom. In John 8:31-32 Jesus says to the Jews who had believed, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth with set you free." When God is my master I am free to be my real self, the person who God created me to be.

A great philosopher, Bob Dylan, once said you have to serve somebody. I surrender my life to serve Jesus and Him only. Raising the Roof and Removing the Walls involves surrender all of yourself to Jesus and allowing Him to be your Master.

Raising the Roof and Removing the Walls
                              Joe